I feel good… But tired

James Brown is just one of many famous folks with a birthday today.  It is also the 17th anniversary of the stillbirth of my oldest biological child, Star.

I imagine she would have looked much like her sisters and have the same ability to wrap me around her finger as they do, also.  I don’t know how it is with other parents of Angel Babies, but I feel Star with me often, especially near her birthday which falls during the energy of Beltaine. (In my mind’s eye she continued to grow up, she didn’t stay an infant.)

Many don’t realize that Beltaine is the opposite of Samhain (Halloween) on the Wheel of the Year. Which means it is Samhain in the Southern hemisphere.  (see: The Other Side for an explanation.) And Vice Versa.
The veil between worlds is thin in Spring just as it is in Autumn.  So it is a time to communicate with those who have passed and also those yet to be born.  I found out that I was pregnant with Dawn on Star’s 3rd birthday during Beltaine 2002. And they have always been spiritually connected.  Dawn used to talk to and play with Star when she was smaller.

And Quin has been talking with her Grandma Sue (my biological mother) all week.  The full moon leading into the holiday really strengthened the connections.  I have felt the shifting this year much stronger than in the past.

Beltaine celebrations have been amazing so far this year.  The learning Circle of which I am a part had our potluck and ritual yesterday (as we typically meet on Monday). It was beautiful, but not necessarily in line with others practices. We are a “learning” Circle, not a Coven.  So, none of us really have the same path, beliefs, or traditions, but we try to experience together and share with each other so that we may continue to learn and honor the Divine. And we truly love one another and have built an extended family.


Our Beltaine Altar 2016

I have considered writing down what it is that I believe that may be far different from other Pagans and/or Witches.  Maybe some of that will appear here…  WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO READ MY THOUGHTS ON?  Please leave a comment and I can make a post with my answer.  (That should motivate me to keep writing here, which I want to do, so ask away!)

I had a lively discussion with Sissypoo on the way home last night about the history and roots of Pagans and Witches.  It really got the gears turning in my head so much that when I went over to Lady Autumn Mist’s home (I help care for her cats and home while she heals from hip replacement surgery), I tried to keep the conversation flowing, but I successfully agitated her by my vastly different opinion on whether a match or lighter should be used to light candles and whatnot during rituals or ceremonies.  That topic may be the first of my opinion posts just to get the ball rolling and see how many feathers I succeed in ruffling.
Nonetheless, I had to quickly change the subject lest my dear heart friend and I put a damper on the night by arguing. She took the hint and changed the topic with me.

All that being written, I must move on to today with preparation of Mother’s Day cards and other less fun tasks. But first, I will be lighting a candle for Star to place on my house altar. And I will most likely use a lighter. [grinning mischievously]

Blessed day and season to you, whether it be Beltaine or Samhain in your part of the world. We are all in this together and need to love one another.


Green Man